Father's Day

Father’s Day

This Father’s Day, I decided to cook a large meal for the Daddy’s in my life instead of looking for one more flashlight, shirt, or gimmick of some sort. A good meal together with family can be a long lasting memory and more special than something purchased. The three daddy’s I have in my life are my husband Gregg, my Father-in-Law: Jimmy and my own Daddy: Paul. I would like to say something about each of them. First there is my husband Gregg, he is one extraordinary man. When we first met 10 years ago, I was attracted to him but feared there would never be a relationship develop because I was almost nine years older than him and was already the mother of two children, one with Down syndrome. He soon proved me wrong, he fell in love with me and the kids and has been by my side along with OUR three kids ever since. He is a great role model and truly the best daddy I have ever known.

My Father-in-Law, Jimmy has truly been like a second daddy to me. I feel I could tell him anything. He is always there for us no matter what time of day or night. There have been many nights when one of the kids needed to go to the ER with some sickness and all I had to do was call him and he came and stayed with the other kids until we got back home. One recent memory was when Shade was in the hospital for 4 days with RSV. Gregg and I were so tired after being awake with Shade night after night because his oxygen would drop and alarms would go off and we would have to wake him up and get him to cough. The first night home we were so scared because there were no alarms to wake us if his oxygen dropped so needless to say we were basket cases and again so very tired. Jimmy volunteered to come and stay with us all night and he did- we were able to sleep while he checked on Shade all night. What a special man and I will not ever forget all he has done for his family.

My own Daddy, Paul Hoxit My daddy and I have battled since I can remember. We could not be more different in our views, nature, or opinions and to be honest he has been a hard man to love on many occasions. He drake really bad when I was little and I can remember my mom having to leave with my brother, sister and me until he would sleep off a drunk. He was a very violent man when he would drink-not to us kids but to my mom and that was hard to watch and very scary. A child does not bond with a parent when those things are witnessed. He finally did stop drinking but the damage was done to our relationship sadly. That is just how it is sometimes. He had reasons for drinking and they were bad reasons, things he has seen and done in Vietnam. There are good memories and I choose to remember those these days. I will share a few: We always had food on the table and clothes to wear, our house was always warm and he always made sure we were covered up on those cold nights. There were also fun times. We grew up on about 70 acres of property and most of that was fields or woods. Many Sunday’s we would go for a family walk complete with the dogs. We would hike up to the top of the mountain. Me and my brother and sister would gather sticks, leaves, rocks, or anything else we thought was magical. There was also a small valley that was filled with fallen leaves. We would slide down that valley in the leaves with our dogs laughing all the way. Sometimes we would find a grapevine and swing on it. What fun that was. There were also the stories he would tell us, like the ones where he fought with Blackbeard the pirate and how we were really related to him. He still laughs about that- and how we believed him. There were rides on his back- while he was on all fours – and Sunday drives. That is the daddy I want to remember and I hope as time passes I will remember more of those magical hikes, stories and Sunday drives. I feel sad about my feelings and know that I mourn what could have been.